Notes on life

Posted by Shreya Das, New Delhi

FEAR, HOPE, BATTLE and SURVIVAL – four things that make up most of our lives. Be it surviving in a city, surviving in an office, surviving from a disease or surviving in a lockdown. We all are in the same boat.

Let me tell you about FEAR.

Fear ceases your thinking, freezes your spine and makes you a coward. We all are driven by fear. This lockdown tried to strike fear into our hearts, and well at some point we were scared. Still are. What we fear the most is losing our or our loved one’s life. And what is worse than losing one’s life – losing one’s identity.

The thing about cancer or any kind of chronic disease is that it eats you up slowly from within. Physical pains are just the start. It gobbles down your identity, you forget what you really were. All that confidence, all that normal abilities to run, talk and smile suddenly vanishes. And when it has done with you, you become a useless piece of junk – weak, irritable, lost and completely spent. It feels like a “dementor” working its way through you (if you are a Harry Potter fan, you will understand.) 

When in hospital, I wished I could go out, eat junk food, travel and not wear that stupid mask. During cancer treatment, you are not allowed to do these things. I still pretty much fear and totally hate the idea of wearing a mask. Now, thanks to COVID-19, it is back to square one, bringing back the sore memories. 

Next, let me tell you what is HOPE? 

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Hope is when you believe that everything will be alright, no matter how hard the times are. Hope is when you look out the window and feel the sunshine through your eyes. When you see your family smiling. When someone blesses you with good health, fortune and success. When you see your best friend standing beside you and saying “I am with you always.”. 

And finally you WIN. 

This is to all who have faced diseases and struggles in their lives. Fear may be real, but so is hope. If there is evil, then there is good. If there is darkness, then there is light. And now after Lockdown 4, we have Unlock 1. 

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Story images : Author

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